INTERVIEWS

ADVENTURES OF A CONTINENTAL DRIFTER

Radar Online
September 21, 2005
by Emma Garman

FREQUENT FLYER
Elliott Hester quit his job, sold all his possessions and spent three years wandering around the world. Jealous?

When, like many airline employees after 9/11, Elliott Hester was offered a leave of absence from his job as a flight attendant, he happily accepted. Between cuts in pay and benefits and an increasing number of disgruntled passengers crammed onto every flight, the job was no longer much fun. So Hester turned in his wings, gave up his Miami apartment, sold his possessions, and took to the road. And that’s where he’s been ever since.

For the last few years Hester has been drifting from country to country, from the relative comfort and safety of Europe (where the Kangol-clad traveler is occasionally mistaken for Samuel L. Jackson) to more exotic locales, such as South America, where he discovered that, yes, eating coca leaves in the jungle does get you high. In his brand new book, Adventures of a Continental Drifter: An Around-the-World Excursion into Weirdness, Danger, Lust, and the Perils of Street Food, Hester describes his wild experiences visiting more than 50 destinations in 22 countries on six continents. Radar Online caught up with him in the middle of his national book tour.

RADAR ONLINE: You’ve been supporting yourself by writing for the last few years [Salon, Details, National Geographic, etc.]. As you traveled the world, were you ever been tempted by any crazy moneymaking schemes, legal or otherwise?
ELLIOTT HESTER: When I was in Sydney somebody approached me and asked if I would be interested in transporting drugs. But I would never in a million years even think about considering it.

Although you did get roped into some cow poaching in French Polynesia.
Right, in the Marquesas Islands. This guy I met, Fili, complained constantly about the fact that all they had to eat was fish. Fish for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. But he’s a big, macho, tattooed guy. And he managed to dissect the cow with a six-inch hunting knife in 45 minutes. It was like watching the chef at Benihana.

There are some shocking descriptions of toilets in your stories. What’s the absolutely worst bathroom setup that you’ve come across?
It was in a town outside Bangalore, India, at the bus station. There were several compartments, each with a corrugated metal door, and an attendant who was banging on the doors one at a time, I guess saying hurry up and get out. Then someone would come out and the attendant would take a bucket of water and slosh it into the area without looking. So when I went in there was just a hole in the ground, and all kinds of fecal matter on the sides and the floor. I just walked out—without going to the bathroom—got on the bus, and waited three hours until I got to my destination.

Speaking of bodily fluids, you tell quite a few tales about losing your lunch on the road. Have you become extracareful about what you eat, or has your stomach toughened up?
I’m careful about what I eat, but ultimately I just resign myself to the fact that I’m going to get sick. It’s just going to happen. All the things that are considered bad for you in the Western world are good for you when you’re in a developing country. For instance, I don’t eat salads when I travel. I don’t eat fruit that can’t be peeled. But fried food, greasy, heavily cooked food, that’s the best thing. I’ve never been as sick in my life as when I had “Delhi belly.” I was in a $14-a-night hotel in Delhi, and for two days I just moved from my bed to the toilet and back. I didn’t eat, and I probably lost about eight pounds.

You had several brushes with death. I particularly enjoyed the story about how you incurred the wrath of a bunch of heavies in a Bangkok girlie bar. What was the most frightening experience?
Actually, it was a scuba diving incident in Australia. I was a brand new diver. I’d just gotten my certification, and it was an open water dive. When I came up to the surface, the waves had increased, and I saw myself slipping away from the boat. I really freaked out. I had a flash in my mind that this was it.

You visited Lithuania, which has the world’s highest suicide rate. What’s so sad about the place?
The way it was explained to me by some of the locals is that when independence came there was the belief that life was going to change drastically under a free government, and it hasn’t really happened for a lot of people. The people who are killing themselves most often are middle-aged men, because suddenly they don’t know where they fit it in modern Lithuanian society.

How about the other side of the coin? What’s the happiest country you’ve visited?
It’s strange, but in some of the poorest places I’ve been, like the favelas in Rio de Janeiro, you see kids who have nothing. They live in shacks and they don’t have electricity, they’re barely eating, but there’s something about the spirit of Brazil. These kids enjoy themselves so much. You see them playing soccer and having a good time, not complaining, at least not in front of outsiders. You look at that, and then you look at some American kids who have everything and they’re whining about getting not getting the Gameboy they wanted.

You’ve had the unusual privilege of seeing extremes of wealth and poverty firsthand, from oil-rich Brunei to war- and famine-stricken Ethiopia, which must deeply affect your attitude toward money.
It really makes you appreciative. I think that every American person, and every Briton and Australian, should go to a developing country, not only to see how well they have it but to see how other people view your country.

Have there been any cultures that didn’t fit in at all with your preconceived ideas?
Singapore. When you’re on the airplane before you land and the flight attendants pass out those immigration cards, on the top of each card it says DEATH TO DRUG TRAFFICKERS in bold red letters. This is what’s going to happen if you break the law, period. It’s such an efficient country, very modern. But at the same time there’s a certain level of repression that doesn’t exist in other parts of the world. For instance, certain books are banned, it’s illegal to chew gum, if you don’t flush the toilet you can get a $500 fine. It’s a little bit over the top.

What’s been the reaction to your adventures from your friends here in the States?
Most people think my lifestyle is courageous. But the irony is I don’t agree. I think that getting married and having children is a major act of courage, because to make those kinds of commitments and to be that responsible takes a great deal of bravery. Me, on the other hand, I get to fuck off when I want to.

Adventures of a Continental Drifter (St. Martin’s) is now available in bookstores..

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